I was recently overheard a conversation on the T (Boston’s subway) between two coworkers who were scheming on how to take more “sick time” without getting caught, brown-nose their boss to get what they want, and stay under the radar. These two individuals were corporate cockroaches!
I have an allergy to corporate cockroaches that no EpiPen can cure. They are the spoon of crap that ruins a barrel of honey and the rotten apples in a bushel of good ones. Nothing makes me angrier than those who try to game the system – their actions hurt both their team and company. As long as we turn a blind eye to corporate cockroaches, they will thrive, so we need to take an active role in keeping these people out of our organizations.
Here’s how you can identify them. Corporate cockroaches:
- Always ask “what’s in it for me?”
- Never show any initiative to take on anything new or even remotely risky
- Will never take responsibility for a mistake
- Spend more time brown-nosing the boss than genuinely helping the team
- Are exceptionally good at knowing office policies and play with loopholes all the time
- Never invest in bettering their knowledge
- Never work past 5pm and make excuses to leave early or take long lunch breaks
- Become the most political people during the hard times
Remember, an organization does not have to be large to have this infestation. Even a small startup can have scum on their team.
So what’s the cure? Be vigilant about the signs of an infestation and fire them without any mercy! Your organization needs to be filled with people who are passionate about their work!
Photo credit: Squall
Hi, my name is Apolinaras Sinkevicius, but most call me Apollo. I am the guy who takes care of the day-to-day business and technology of rapidly growing companies. 12 years in managing the "nuts and bolts" of companies and being a steward of corporate cultures makes me a seasoned operations professional and right hand person to founders and CEOs.
Agree! The corporates cockroaches are very smart they are! Instead of working in providind the corporation solutions to the problems, they are politicking, kissing the manager's ass, cursing their subordinates to self-prove that they really are the boss, discussing peanuts problems for hours, harassing who works and presents results, ivluding the ones that are outstanding in the dept.
Ohhh, I forgot to mention the attemptations to flert with the gorjeous secretary, and so on. He is married, but he needs to reafirm their “stalion” features. He tries to sem always clever than the others, and, once-in-a-while, they steal somenone's ideas, then presenting them to the manager.
A secondary characteristic of corporate cockroaches, is that they provide a useful metric. If you see an organization that is promoting them, you see an organization illness. Sell your stock now.
A secondary characteristic of corporate cockroaches, is that they provide a useful metric. If you see an organization that is promoting them, you see an organization illness. Sell your stock now.
A secondary characteristic of corporate cockroaches, is that they provide a useful metric. If you see an organization that is promoting them, you see an organization illness. Sell your stock now.
Good one – I have faced lot of them in every org . It depends upon your supervisor how to identify them fast & clip them